I’d been creating all day, my fingers flying over the keyboard as the music and the marijuana took me to another place, somewhere I could let go and be myself without worry or judgement. It may have been a fantasy but it was my own and the only true freedom I had from the ever watchful eyes of Reaper.  That bastard was everywhere and be damned if I was going to give him fodder for the family to use against me.   The crackling sounds that greets my ears as I arch my back in my chair tells me that I need to get my ass up and move, very soon, and twist my body where I sit, feeling the tension in my shoulders lessen slightly as I stretched. What I’d give for a strong pair of hands to massage the stress and strain out of my muscles, to play me like a violin but alas, I am in exile and the only pleasure available to me is by my own hand or in my little world where nothing was fattening and sex was always worth bragging about.  Where I could kill indiscriminately and without pretending remorse.

A knock at the front door drags me out of my reverie, and I sigh as I rise from my desk, padding barefoot down the hall. A shadow at the stairs stops me dead in my tracks, freezing my blood and shrinking my veins.  The sun shone brightly through the window scattering the darkness like fairy dust and stealing my breath away.  Another knock hurries me to the big oak door where the crudely made skull doorknob stands out in harsh relief. I grasp it and turn, placing my left hand on the frame to yank  it open, cursing the humidity as it gave and I staggered back a step.

“Fuck. Sorry, Hello?” I sing, feeling like a fool as I open the door wider to reveal an amused pair of chocolate-brown eyes,  along with the smile that lights up the face of the most handsome man I’d seen in a long time. “Hi, I’m from the city? I’m here to check the pipes? I heard they were clogged” he said, his smile widening as he scans his eyes down my body, lingering on the return trip. I laugh out loud, grabbing him by the collar and pulling him inside where I could hug him properly, and without prying eyes.

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I wrap my arms around him, standing on my tiptoes to reach his shoulders and squeeze him tightly to me. “Dammit you were supposed to warn me before you got here!” I growl good-naturedly, delighting in how his arms enclose me and how it feels like home. I couldn’t explain it, not to myself and not to anyone else – It just was and I was glad for it. “Nice clothes. Do you always open the door dressed like that” Jesus Jes, I could have been an axe murdering pervert.” I stare at him a moment, wondering if this man knew me at all then giggled, “Stop teasing. That’s hot…and maybe an axefall would break this fucking dry spell.” His smile retreats slightly, drawing in the corners of his full lips and dampening the delight that had his eyes sparkling just moments before, “I’m here now. We’ll get you fixed up. Speaking of which, nice work clothes. Doesn’t leave much to the imagination. “

I look down and blush. He was right, boy shorts and a sports bra didn’t leave much to the imagination but it has hot as hell, I’d worked hard for my body and I wanted to show it off some.  I  told him as much, before planting a light kiss on his lips and stepping out of his embrace. “C’mon pervert,  I’ll show you where you can lay your weary bones.” I started the long climb to the second floor, counting the steps as I did when I was little, pausing on thirteen to look over my shoulder and finding myself alone. “Well? Are you coming or not?” He stands there staring at me with the oddest expression, and with no response. I hate that. “HEY! Earth to Kip? Oh for…” I snarl under my breath, cursing the damned stairs yet again as I walk back down. His eyes follow my progress, boring holes into my brain with his gaze.

“Hey Kip, what’s the deal? Are you going to stand here all day?”

“Do you ever not ask questions?” he laughs, confusing me more, taking my hand and pulling me off my feet from the last stair into a hug that I willingly returned and with vigor.

“C’mon goofy, let’s get you settled. Put me down,” I giggle, feeling his smile against my neck and lightly slapping his shoulder as he loosens his hold, allowing me to slide to my feet and snatch up his bag. This time Kip followed, a few steps behind, commenting on the restoration that had been done before I moved in.  He marvels over the different decorative accents that I rarely notice, his voice faltering as I reach the landing at the top. I glance over my shoulder as he grabs my hand and holds me there while he climbs the remaining stairs that will bring us eye to eye. “Everyone misses you. They wish you’d come home,” he says quietly, cupping my chin so I can’t look away and I do anyway.  My eyes flicker here and there, desperately looking for a place to land so that I could throttle back the tears threatening to spill over.  Be damned if I was going to cry in front of him. “Look at me Majesty. You have to deal with it. All this,” he said sternly, waving his arm around, “is this helping? You’re alone in a place meant for a dozen. And you live where, down in your office. For chrissake Jes. Just come home.”

“I should have known. You didn’t come to see me – you came on their orders. I’m not going back there Kip. No force on Earth could convince me otherwise. I’ve stayed quiet.  I haven’t gone to the media,  although I easily could. How could you?” I spit at him, pulling free and dropping his bag at his feet, “You tried. You can go back and tell them you failed. Get out.” I nearly run to my bedroom and slam the door, sliding to the floor as I shattered. The tears I’d been fighting to hold back finally breaking free of their dam. “Damn it. DAMN IT. Why? Now I have leave again. I like this house.” I weep into my hands as silently as possible.  Even alone, I can’t stand the sound of my own misery.

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There is a sliding sound from the other side of the door, a muted thud and a sigh. “Here,” Kip murmurs, and I look down to see a misshapen kleenex poking from the gap under the door. I slide it out,  holding its coolness to my hot face as it drinks up the precious fluids from my skin.

“Thank you.”

“Jes, you always do this. Why cry alone? I’m here, and I did come to see you. Because I missed you. They don’t know where you are or where I am. Four connections to get here Jes. They can’t know. Can I come in, please?” His voice was killing me, making me feel like the worst person in the world and I rise to my knees to turn the knob and let him in.  He falls backwards, knocking his head on the floor at my knees and I giggle out loud, immediately regretting it as he rubs his noggin.

“Oh sweetie, sorry,” I chuckle, laying my hand on his chest, “Do you need an icepack? A doctor?” as I sit back down beside him, my legs curling in, I lean down to smile into his eyes. “No, I dont’ need ice and I don’t need a doctor. I need this,” he whispers, placing his hand on my neck and kissing me hard. All the old feelings came roaring back, and I kissed him back, feeling my body respond as it always had to his touch, to the sensation of his tongue licking my lips and his teeth biting gently.

“Kip,” I gasp, breaking the kiss and moving back, “No, I can’t,” knowing full well I could and God those lips.  I want to give in to that familiar ache. Kip rises to his knees, and tugs be back hard against his firm body, the rigidity of his excitement hot and demanding. Over and over he kisses me, as he slides his hands under my flimsy bra to cup my breasts, his fingers finding my hard nipples and squeezing , twisting until I nearly scream with want.

“No, Jes? Tell me no and I’ll stop, ” He pants in my ear as pinches harder, his other hand wrapping itself in my hair and bending my head back as he nips at my collar-bone and all I can do is sigh.  “Silence gives permission,” he growls as his teeth enclose around my nipple, tongue teasing the tip and sending a bolt of lightning straight to my pleasure centre.  Nothing else matters, not even the insistent ringing of the telephone can penetrate the bubble we are in.  Willingly, after too long without contact, I simply give in and let the world slip away.

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I wake slowly, stretching languorously in my bed before reaching out to find the other side of the bed empty.  If it weren’t for the delicious ache in my thighs and the sting of my nipples I’d have thought it was a dream.  I could hear muffled talking from the hall and creep out of the warm sheets to the slightly open door.  Kip was talking on his cell, his tone low and cold, spitting the words in a growl.

“I’ve known her most my life and fucked her off and on for half.  I found her stockpile.  Proof at the least.  What do you want me to do?”

He was quiet a moment, and I can hear the smile in his voice, “Yeah, I can keep her occupied for a few more days.  I’m sure her family will be devastated…”  My family knows nothing of my whereabouts, of this I have made sure, and so this former flame of mine is a liar and a fraud.  He knows what we are.  He knows what I am.  And now I will have reason to end his life, although it aches and burns in my chest to have to do so.  Perhaps a welcome feast is in order I whisper to myself with a nod and I slip back between the sheets to wait for Kip’s deceitful return, something I was sure wouldn’t be long.  There would be others coming and in only a few days time.

“Jes?”  I don’t respond but simply lay still beneath the soft egyptian cotton sheet with my hands thrown over my head.   I was already considering my options when the warmth of his mouth presses lightly over my jugular, a familiar gesture that started my nerve endings gangling in anticipation. The last thing I need is to be swayed by the magic of his lovemaking but biology being what it is, I react and ruin the scenario that had been building in my mind.

“Kip.”

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Cover Created by Tim Miller

Death by Poetry ebook

 

 

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