So I’m out with my sisters the other night, doin girl stuff…ogling…drinking…swearing…that’s right,..we do it too. Across the street, just near the alley, I see this guy.
Now, I noticed him before. And he’s handsome. But he’s been there a while…or we have. He’s always just watching, always watching. (If you heard that in the voice of Roz from Monsters Inc…good. It was intentional).
By now one of the sisters has noticed. I think she’s nervous. Her eyes just got really wide…maybe she knows him! But before I can ask, we are moving, quickly. I’m confused…whats causing this? Surely not….I look back and Mr. Handsome is gone.
I reign in the girls, wanting to know what the fuck the deal is. It’s a bitch to speed walk in these heels after all.
“Didn’t you see that guy?”
Well…yeah…of course I did. What’s the issue? He was harmless. Just a friendly lurker. The looks I get range from a smirk to complete horror. Now I’m REALLY confused. I point out to my darling sisters that he’s GONE…pointing back the way we came.
The stare. You know the one. It’s the look of pure terror…now pure terror has many faces. Terror that someone’s crush just walked up behind them while his/her name was spoken. Terror of an upcoming project…but this was a sight to behold. This look….the one where your voice ceases, your breath stops, heart pounds, eyes open wide…I see you smiling. You love that look.
So I turn, not really expecting anything THAT terrifying, and I run into Mr. Handsome. Imagine my shock…the guy is a ninja. He’s dressed sharply, looks great in blue, He’s holding an axe. Interesting accessory…must be a free spirit. I turn back to the girls…smiling.
“Hey!! It’s that guy!”
And they’re gone. Nice…my sisters abandoned me to suffer alone. I hate it when I don’t have backup while chatting up a cute guy. I turn back and find the axe raised…